bludhavenguardian: (Sleepy)
[personal profile] bludhavenguardian


Dick woke up Monday morning to find himself unexpectedly female.

He tried to think of why it might be. He couldn't remember anyone throwing a curse on him, and he'd definitely been male when he went to bed. Whatever the cause, he clearly couldn't go into work like this.

He rolled over and grabbed his phone. It rang twice before Amy picked up. "Rohrbach," she said.

"Hi, it's Dick." His voice was still rough from sleep, but he winced at the obvious pitch difference. "Look, I'm really sick."

"Yeah, you sound bad," Amy said, sounding concerned. "Planning on staying home today?"

"I'm sorry, I'd come in if I could."

"No problem, Grayson. Get better. Bludhaven PD can function without you for a day or two."

"Thanks."

After hanging up, Dick lay back down. He should probably try to figure out what the hell happened, but really, he just wanted to go back to sleep. Hopefully his problem would be gone by the time he woke up.

No such luck. Six hours later he woke up to someone pounding on the door. And he was still female. He shrugged on some boxers that fit more loosely than he was used to and a shirt. He glanced at himself in the mirror and... no, that wouldn't do at all, he was clearly a woman. He grabbed his robe and tied it over him loosely. That hid the shape of his body. Nothing he could do about his face. He opened the door and saw Clancy, arms akimbo, glaring up at him.

"Grayson, you have some nerve missing out on our lunch like that! Again!" she said. "You could have at least called me!"

"Oh, man, I completely forgot," Dick said, his voice coming out... feminine. "I'm sorry, Clance." He tried lowering it, it just sounded strange. He coughed, hoping to cover it. "Look, I'm kind of sick. I missed work and everything. I'll make it up to you when I'm better?"

Clancy nodded. "Yeah, you sound kind of weird. Though you're looking better than ever. Still took the time to shave while you're sick?"

Dick shrugged and forced a smile. "I didn't throw up until I'd finished shaving," he lied. "You should probably go, I might be contagious."

"Oh, right." Clancy stepped outside. "I'll bring you some soup or something later, okay? Take care of yourself, Grayson. You can make up our lunch later."

"That'd be great." Dick smiled and closed the door behind her, then groaned. He really needed to figure this out.

He called Zatanna, but her assistant said she was on a mission in space with the Justice League. Fine, she'd call him back later. It seemed more and more likely this problem wouldn't be fixed by tonight. Fine.

He found a sports bra Babs had left at some point or another and put it on. His own briefs fit, though not comfortably. The costume pressed in all the wrong places, but he looked enough like a man that no one would notice unless they looked carefully, and he didn't intend anyone to have that chance.

He went out to try and get used to the female body. It wasn't that different than being male. His overall weight was the same so he could still jump and fly exactly how he'd always done it. Fine, he could patrol. But that could wait a few hours.

He went back to his apartment and changed into a t-shirt and jeans. Then he called Babs.

"Hey, Man Wonder," Babs said. "How's your day been? I heard you're sick."

"Not exactly Man Wonder," Dick said. "You hacked my phone but you didn't check your cameras?"

"What do you mean?" Dick could hear typing in the background. Then Barbara said, "Oh," quietly. She sounded amused.

"You're bisexual, right?" Dick asked.

"Yes, Babe Wonder, and you should head over here right now."

Dick chuckled. "I'll be there soon, Babs."

"While you're getting here, I'll see if I can't figure out what caused your little situation."

"Thanks. See you in a few."

"Later."

Dick hung up and started the Nightbird.

Half an hour later he was walking into the Clocktower. "Hello, beautiful," he said, walking over to Barbara. He leaned down and kissed her, winding a hand in her hair.

"Mmm, hi," Babs said, kissing him back. "You make a damn pretty girl, Dick."

"Thanks, I think." Dick laughed a little. "How're things going?"

"Pretty good. I think I isolated the cause of your problem." She skated a hand down his side, copping a quick feel. "Where'd you get the bra?"

Dick gave a guilty grin. "It's yours. Can the cause wait?"

Barbara slipped her hand further down Dick's body and tripped him, sending him tumbling into Babs' lap. Maybe he wasn't as capable in his new body as he thought, or maybe as usual, Babs made him weak in the knees because normally he wasn't this easy to trip. "It can wait." She pulled him up into a kiss and he wrapped his arms around her and kissed back, hard. She dropped her hands and wheeled them to the bedroom, still kissing him.

A little while later they were tangled up in each other and the sheets, completely naked.

"So that's why women have sex," Dick commented. "I like the whole multiple orgasm thing."

"I like it too." Babs rolled over and kissed him. "You sure you want to change back?"

"Yes. Very much so."

Babs laughed. "I called Zatanna. She'll be here in..." she looked at the clock. "Half an hour, probably."

"I should get dressed."

"Mmm. Soon." Babs lay down on top of him. Their breasts rubbed against each other in a very pleasant way. "It was your fight against that sorcerer with Wally last week. He jerked you out of the way of the spell, but not fast enough. The speed force particles affected the magic so that the effect was delayed. But Zatanna said she could undo it."

"Great." Dick smiled. "It was a fun experiment, but I prefer being a guy. Plus, I think my civilian friends might not understand."

Babs kissed his shoulder. "I prefer you as a guy too, you know. It feels more you."

"Thanks." Dick played idly with her hair. "I should probably get dressed."

"Don't bother on my account," Zatanna said, sounding amused.

"Zatanna!" Dick pulled the sheets up over them both hurriedly.

Zatanna waved. "Sorry, I was early." she pointed at Dick. "Namow kcab otni nam." With a slight pop, Dick's body went back to being male. "You two have fun." She bowed. "Annataz away!" She vanished in a puff of smoke before Babs or Dick could say anything.

Dick leaned back. "That was... huh. I'll have to call and thank her."

"Yes," Babs said. She traced her fingers along his chest. "But she did tell us to have fun, and I feel like I could manage another one of those multiple orgasms."

Dick laughed. "I think I could manage that."

He had at least another hour before he had to be back in Bludhaven. He was entirely prepared to make that time count.

Dick Grayson
DC Comics
word count: 1190
Not mine.
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Dick Grayson (Nightwing)

October 2009

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